Theme Layout

Boxed or Wide or Framed

[Wide]

Theme Translation

Display Featured Slider

Featured Slider Styles

[Fullwidth]

Display Grid Slider

Grid Slider Styles

Display Trending Posts

No

Display Author Bio

Display Instagram Footer

How to Trust After Betrayal



Feeling betrayed has got to be one of the worst feeling ever felt, especially when you're in a relationship. Betrayal however, doesn’t just occur in a relationship, it can happen in the best of friendships too. That feeling may very well have you thinking that you can never trust anyone again. One thing to note about betrayal in a relationship, is that it isn't always about infidelity. There are many things that can happen to leave us feeling betrayed from a loved one, such as:

  • White lies.
  • Emotion cheating.
  • Broken promises.
  • Laziness in the relationship.

The list could go on because each of us feels betrayal and deceit in different ways. There is no exact definition of what one can classify as feeling betrayed. You see, the feeling of betrayal is an emotion and there’s no other person besides you who can feel that emotion in the way you do. While the emotion of feeling betrayed can weigh heavy on your heart, regardless of what happened, there are ways you can learn how to trust after betrayal has hit your life.

Zero Tolerance Honesty Policy
If you are really trying to move forward with the person who betrayed you, then you must enable a zero tolerance honesty policy. This means you both vow to be nothing but honest to each other from this moment forward as a means to rebuild the trust faster. There’s nothing worse than the desire to trust after betrayal only to find out the partner is continuously hiding things still.


Ask Questions to Understand
This may be the most difficult portion of learning how to trust after betrayal as it involves you asking more questions than the partner may be comfortable with. Once trust has been broken, you will want to work hard to ensure all unanswered questions are addressed; this will clear the air and allow you to regain trust in this person as well as others in your life.

Listen to Your Gut Instincts
While it may be easy to get fooled back into trusting someone after a betrayal, for their words just make absolute sense, and they are quite charming in their efforts to pacify the situation. Do not let go of that little gut instinct telling you that your feelings are not completely healed yet. If you don’t listen to your gut instincts and your own internal emotions, you will not be able to fully heal from betrayal.

Take Time for Yourself
The best way to learn how to trust after betrayal is to take a look in the mirror, learn what you can tolerate and cannot tolerate in life. Determine who you are to your core and what you are able to feel comfortable with in a relationship or friendship. Whatever is therapeutic for you at this time is something you will want to do; writing, walking, reading a book, etc.


Talk To Trusted Friends
Reach out to your most trusted of friends to discuss this feeling of betrayal.  Learn to reach out to only the most trusted of friends who you know won’t spew out negativity. Surround yourself with friends who want you to heal from this hurtful situation. Open up freely to those trusted friends and hear out what they have to say.

There are many ways people cope with betrayal and learn how to trust again, you may feel as if it isn’t possible at this moment in time. Your feelings are still raw and fresh, but we promise you that working to learn how to trust after betrayal will only make you a stronger person in the long run. We hope that these tips will work to guide you back on a positive track in life.
Annmarie John
32 Comments
Share :

32 comments:

  1. This is very hard to do even with employees, what more with friends or family. Fortunately, I have not yet experienced something so major that I cannot forgive.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's great Fred and I hope it stays that way for you.

      Delete
  2. Perhaps this will be one of my challenges as a human being. Once my trust is broken it's hard to get it back, I think the same goes for everybody. But there are people who can forgive easily and there are those who have been hurt for years so it's more difficult for them to forgive. It's important to take it one day at a time and to work with the person who betrayed your trust. But also make sure that you are not forcing yourself to feel better or anything like that. Your feelings matter most when it comes to betrayal.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is very much the same with me. Once my trust is broken, it's almost impossible to get it back and while I can forgive, I almost never forget.

      Delete
  3. Putting back trust is a very difficult challenge for most people. As they say, we can forgive but can't forget. One may have to go through counseling to heal the emotional wounds.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is very true and that's what it is for me. I can forgive but can never truly forget.

      Delete
  4. After betrayal of a friend, family member or a person with deeper relationship with you, I think, we have to analyze our steps to improvement when tackling such cases. For friendm it's different, and for lovers, it's alsi different. The degree of trust really depends on how far the relationship will propser.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fernando, you're right the relationship does play a role in how much trust you can foster when it's betrayed.

      Delete
  5. In the current world it's real hard to trust someone but still we do as we are human.I also betrayed several times and trusted again somebody...anyway nice tips

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is hard, you really don't know who you can trust these days.

      Delete
  6. I think it's important to take it one step at a time in regaining trust. It's really something that can be restored in an instant but eventually, we have to relearn it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And I agree with you. If you run back into things, trusting without a care, it's likely that you'll get hurt again. Take things one step/one day at a time.

      Delete
  7. Like many others, once my trust is broken, I can never 100% trust the person ever again as well. You will forever have doubts and suspicions. And also like you, I can forgive but almost never forgets. This is a really great article though! <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is also true Rebecca. I know from experience that it's almost impossible to ever trust 100% again. There are always niggling doubts that remains.

      Delete
  8. I believe it is a process for one to finally trust again the one who betrayed her/him. It may take sometime but sure if the suspect will only be working on the things to restore what has been damaged, perhaps, it will heal the victim's wound that is if the former is willing to work on it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's the thing. You both have to be willing to work on things.

      Delete
  9. Great article! I definitely agree with all of your points. I love the idea of a zero tolerance honesty policy, it's one I had never thought of before but it makes perfect sense. Also, having a friend to talk to who won't spew negativity or encourage bad behavior is a great idea. Sometimes friends might encourage you to do something hurtful in retaliation to the person who initially hurt you. We don't want that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No you do not want that at all. While it may be tempting it really does nothing for you and you may even end up feeling worse yourself.

      Delete
  10. In today's world, it is so difficult to trust especially when that betrayal comes from your close friends or family.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh tell me about it. It has happened to me with family and I no longer trust them at all.

      Delete
  11. Well this is auch a sensitive topic
    I can never trust again. Well maybe i can for 40%

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That 100% trust needs to be earned back.

      Delete
  12. I guess the key is, how to trust the same person after the a betrayal. It took me 2 years to get over a betrayal as my ex never did apologize for his mistake. Good thing is, I tried to build up my confidence first before I learn to trust again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't you just hate that? When they never apologize? Or they give a fake apology? The worst is someone not admitting to their mistakes or even putting the blame on you.

      Delete
  13. Difficult to trust once it is broken! But yes, we also need to give benefit of doubt to the person and let it go one time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes that's also true. You can give the benefit of the doubt but still take it one step at a time.

      Delete
  14. A friend of mine found love after a divorce and now she's happiest now!! I love up to her..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Love after divorce is very possible and I'm very happy for her.

      Delete
  15. These tips are spot-on but I think genuine reconciliation can only take place when the offender accepts responsibility for the betrayal. I have seen situations where an offender pretends nothing happened. At such times, I think the other party is better off alone. I also find it difficult to trust after a betrayal but I'm working on that tendency.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You got it! Unless the offender truly accepts responsibility and not try to cover it up or pretend it didn't happen it will be hard to ever trust again.

      Delete
  16. yes great points! taking time for yourself is something that has helped me. i find out a lot about myself and it helps me grown more

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh you most certainly have got to take time for yourself. It's really the only way you can "find yourself".

      Delete

[name=AnnMarie John] [img=https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-X9gUeVik-ZY/WJjwNTOobII/AAAAAAABTJ4/qEhU0n62_AIo-j6-6LA2OFOr44lKCHASwCLcB/s100/AnnMarie%2BJohn%2BHeadshot.JPG] [description=AnnMarie John is a lifestyle blogger, mom of 4, retired army veteran and a huge Disney lover. Formerly from the beautiful island of St. Vincent and the Grenadines in the Caribbean and now living in colorful Colorado, she loves sharing her opinions on everything, crafting and food.] (facebook=http://www.facebook.com/theannmariejohn) (instagram=http://www.instagram.com/theannmariejohn) (twitter=http://www.twitter.com/theannmariejohn) (pinterest=http://www.pinterest.com/theannmariejohn) (email=mailto:annmarie@annmariejohn.com)

Follow @TheAnnMarieJohn