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Why You Need to Say No More Often



If you tend to be a people pleaser, you know, the type of person who has a difficult time saying no to the ever growing demands of family, friends and co-workers, then this post is for you! Those who have mastered saying no as a means to stay balanced and refreshed in life are quite successful and much happier than those who continuously find difficulty in that little two letter word. Today we are going to enlighten your mind as we share reasons why you need to say no more often as a means to end the cycle of people constantly taking away from your well-being and peace of mind.


Saying no to someone who is constantly asking for help with everything in life allows you to give them a chance at figuring things out on their own. You know the type of person who seems to want everyone else doing things for them, but rarely, if ever, returns the favor. These people may not even realize they are doing it, but once you start to say no to them you are actually encouraging them to stand up in their own life and do things on their own. Saying no in this scenario allows another person to build their self-confidence and learn new ways to cope when life throws them a curve ball.

By being the person who always says yes, you have opened your world to a bowl full of unnecessary added stress.  Those who won’t say no to others are actually saying no to their own well-being while saying yes to others well-being. Can you see how that is a little backwards?! You need to learn to be the most important person in your life, after all, what would your family do if you are in a hospital all laid up from health issues due to stress all because you couldn’t say that two letter word more often?! When you stop to say no, you are starting to put yourself first and in turn become a less stressed out person because you are only committing to what you feel you can handle in your daily life.


As you work towards saying no more often, you become more assertive as a person, which is a total win! When you naturally start to become a more assertive person the world turns into a totally different world for you, as things start to just work out, and those time vampires dissipate from your life.  While it may hurt to see some people disappear from your life, remember that if they truly were that great of a friend then one little word wouldn’t make them disappear. Those who are your true friends will learn to respect and appreciate this new assertive, self you are growing to be.

Let's discuss: How comfortable are you with saying NO?

Annmarie John
42 Comments
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42 comments:

  1. It's true many people are struggle to say no in case it'd hurt for those who ask for the favor, but I guess living in balance is the key, that goes also to give the "yes or no' answer. There's time to say yes and there's a time to say no.

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    1. Yes you've got that right. I've found my balance and have learned how to say no a lot more often.

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  2. I have no problem saying no. I don't want my kids to think they can always get everything they want.

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    1. While it's easy saying no to your kids, what about others?

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  3. I agree with you 100% on this and actually wrote a post similar to this not long ago. Saying no does not make me a bad person which took we such a long time to learn.

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    1. Oh it surely doesn't make you a bad or mean person. I will have to read your post.

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  4. I am certainly getting better at this out of pure necessity. I don't have enough hours to do everything I need to do and everything that others need to do, too! Something's gotta give and surely it isn't my tasks!

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    1. You've got to take time for yourself and you can't do it all, so eventually you've got to learn to say NO, and mean it.

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  5. Excellent!! Learning to say no is so challenging, but very rewarding. I grew up in an abusive family, and saying no was akin to using the most foul curse you can come up with, and was instantly punished - and I mean saying no to anything at all, not just in normal ways when a kid maybe shouldn't say no to their parents. This has caused me a lot of trouble add a teen and now an adult. I'm much better at it now, and it's a huge relief.

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    1. Oh I found about how rewarding it is. I used to be one of those who couldn't say no, now I say it a lot more often without guilt.

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  6. With my kids, it's more easy. With Cassidy, I'm still learning. With the rest of the world? Much harder! I do find that balance, though. It's important.

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    1. Oh it can be tough with others that aren't family and I think with our significant others are probably the hardest.

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  7. Yes to No! haha... You are totally right on about this and its important to remember to take care of yourself and not just others around you. We all need to remember this!
    Karen | GlamKaren.com

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    1. Oh most certainly. We have to take care of ourselves before we can do anyone else.

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  8. In my 20's I really disliked saying no because I felt like I was being a mean person when I said No. But...now that I'm in my 30's I say no way more often...and I'm glad I do!!

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    1. Oh I'm totally in agreement! I've learned to say no more often and it's exhilarating.

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  9. I go back and forth with no. Sometimes it is good to say no and stick to it.

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    1. Yes that's true! I've learned how to say it though but it took some time.

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  10. I never had a problem saying no. To me it was pretty natural. When I knew something was bad for my daughter, I would not give it to her. I still don't have a problem with saying no today, and my daughter is nineteen!

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    1. While it's ok with children, what about others around you?

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  11. I have absolutely no problem with saying no. I know my limits. Life is so much better that way.

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    1. Kudos to you Jill, I wish everyone was like you.

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  12. I totally needed to read this today! I somethings struggle with saying no. Thanks for the great reminders!

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    1. I totally get that, I sometimes have a hard time with certain things but it feels good to say no sometimes.

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  13. I love the idea of becoming a more assertive person. I tend to avoid conflict and feel like I get run over sometimes. I am trying to get better especially when it comes to representing my kids.

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    1. Oh you do have to be more assertive when it comes to your kids and being assertive is healthy.

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  14. I need to say no more often. I'm always worried I'll hurt someones feelings when I don't agree or say yes. But I need to make sure I'm making myself a priority first.

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    1. I used to worry a lot about others feelings as well but now I don't care. I'm at that point in my life where my sanity comes first.

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  15. I really need to start doing this more often!

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  16. I grew up in a family where i wasn't allowed to say no. So now as an adult I find it really hard to say it. I am trying to get better about it.

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    1. Oh you need to learn how to say it and mean it. I allow my kids to say no within reason of course. It's a healthy word to use.

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  17. For so long I hated saying no because I was always a people pleaser but over the years I have realized I need to be more assertive and now I couldn't care what other people think. It is good to say no!

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  18. I always hated saying no but over the years I am able to say it more frequently. I don't care what people think any more x

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    1. When you stop worrying about what people think, that's when you finally become in control of yourself.

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  19. Great timing! I am at a place where I need to say no, but can still have trouble. I just want to do it all! lol

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    1. Seem I'm the complete opposite so I say NO a LOT.

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  20. I needed this! I've realized that I am a people pleaser and one of my kids is as well. I need to break the habits for the sake of both of us.

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    1. Oh while it's ok to people others at times, you've also got to take into consideration the amount of time that it takes for you to do things. I try and do things on my own time but have learned to say no a lot more often.

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  21. This was so me about a year ago. I couldn't say no to anybody or any thing, and now I do I'm so much happier - do things for yourself more often!

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    1. More power to you and that's the best! You've got to learn to say no more often for your own health at times.

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[name=AnnMarie John] [img=https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-X9gUeVik-ZY/WJjwNTOobII/AAAAAAABTJ4/qEhU0n62_AIo-j6-6LA2OFOr44lKCHASwCLcB/s100/AnnMarie%2BJohn%2BHeadshot.JPG] [description=AnnMarie John is a lifestyle blogger, mom of 4, retired army veteran and a huge Disney lover. Formerly from the beautiful island of St. Vincent and the Grenadines in the Caribbean and now living in colorful Colorado, she loves sharing her opinions on everything, crafting and food.] (facebook=http://www.facebook.com/theannmariejohn) (instagram=http://www.instagram.com/theannmariejohn) (twitter=http://www.twitter.com/theannmariejohn) (pinterest=http://www.pinterest.com/theannmariejohn) (email=mailto:annmarie@annmariejohn.com)

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